Connection. What is the emotion when connection is rebuffed. Shame. Anger is a secondary emotion.
Only path to more intimacy and closeness is more vulnerability.
We make up stories in our minds to explain others' behavior toward us. Our brains require a narrative and rewards us chemically, whether or not it is accurate.
Limited data points filled in with personal values and narratives: conspiracy.
Middle space: too far in to turn back, but can't see the light at the end. What we do in the middle space separates leaders from non-leaders. It doesn't become any easier with repetition.
Transformational leaders when confronted with the middle space: Reckoning, rumble, revolution
Reckon with the emotions. Become curious why you feel the way you do. Emotion is a part of our selves. Emotions have to be addressed before cognition can take place. "Help me understand."
Rumble with emotions. Have to get brave about talking about emotions. Be willing to be uncomfortable, face discomfort. Don't sweep it under or away. Rumble with what's true and hard. You can choose courage or comfort but not both.
When this becomes a practice, a revolution occurs.
When we pretend hard things aren't happening, we still make up stories but they aren't true. And it only leads to more cover-ups and harm. Be courageous and vulnerable. Face the truth and take control of the end of your stories.
The bravest among us will be the most broken hearted because we have the courage to love.
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